Season 1, Episode 4: "Sleep On It"

Ah, lunch time. I remember the days as a junior high school student shuffling into the cafeteria, standing on line for ten minutes, only to receive an ice cold slice of pizza that literally came right out of the oven. And I'll also never forget that time I found a dead fly in another slice of pizza. But here at Lucky Junior High, it's Sloppy Joe and lemon squares day, so it's all good.

So, the gals are planning a slumber party. They can't do it at Ginger's house because the VCR is broken, as if that's a perfectly legitimate excuse to not host a party there. Dodie suggests having the party at her house since they left their pajamas there last time. Odd reason--and odd that both Ginger and Macie both left their pajamas there--but I guess it would be one less item to bring. Anywho, Courtney eavesdrops yet again, and is totally bamboozled by the idea of sleeping at other peoples' houses. Oh, come on! Is she really that sheltered that she's never heard of a slumber party? Hasn't she seen TV shows and movies about them? Or, since Courtney stalks Ginger so much, she must have overheard Ginger talking about slumber parties before, no? This is a strange lapse in logic and storytelling that should have raised a flag as red as Ginger's hair when this story was pitched in the meeting room.

Regardless, you would think at least Miranda would have slept over Courtney's house since they're supposed to be friends. I'm beginning to think Courtney only keeps Miranda around because she's the only one willing to talk about Ginger 90 percent of the time.

Miranda explains the concept of slumber parties to Courtney, and Courtney sounds so intrigued by them that she decides to have one of her very own. I've never seen this episode, but I guarantee she's going to invite Ginger. So, Courtney pitches the idea to her mother, who apparently has never heard of slumber parties, either. What the hell, did the entire Gripling family line sprout from under a rock? I don't care how rich you are; there is no way in Hell that any American family has never heard of a slumber party. That is just completely unrealistic. Anyway, Blake decides he wants a slumber party too. Hey, what the heck? Welcome to the teen world, little flowers.

"Girls sleeping on floors? Overnight until morning? Next you're going to tell me you'll be eating meals without silverware!"

Courtney's mom thinks it's a dumb idea, but allows her naïve little flowers to branch out into the sunlight for the first time.

Courtney and Blake pop over to Ginger's house to invite Ginger and Carl (and Hoodsey) to their respective sleepovers, which Ginger nervously accepts. Nervously, because these two girls cannot be nonchalant with each other. Carl accepts Blake's invitation, but Hoodsey would rather sleep in an alley next to a hobo.

Ginger reveals the news to Dodie and Macie, and they practically force her to go to Courtney's party instead of having their own. You know, because OMG! IT'S COURTNEY GRIPLING! Squeeeeeee!

Anyway, Dodie is super excited for Ginger because to her, it's an adult slumber party, with "sleep ensembles" and "sophisticated party games." Seriously? Remember, these girls are still, like 12 years old. Rich or not, sleepover shenanigans all boil down to girls gabbing about all the boys they've been felt up by and taking a black to all the faces of the unpopular kids in their yearbook. Oh, innocent Dodie, wait until college; you'll see for what a real "adult slumber party" is like.

"Adult slumber parties sound like so much fun! They must be super sophisticated!"

Ginger finds out that Carl will be spending the night in the very same Gripling home, and she flips her lid. Carl says he's really only going to get his petrified eyeball back, which does make sense. But Carl reassures her by saying his goal is to get his petrified eyeball back. Hmm, that's kind of a dead giveaway that the puberty stick hasn't struck him yet.

Ginger and Macie arrive at Dodie's house and walk in on a book club taking place in the living room. Macie almost spoils the ending of the book, because that's just like Macie to be cheeky. Stealing tartar sauce and almost spoiling book endings. See, her kind of evil is like tiny kitten scratches on your leg. Those damn little claws.

"Spoiler alert! Snape kills Dumbledore."

Dodie somehow got a hold of Courtney's guest list and produces a little blue box from under her bed. She pulls out a flash card with popular girl Mipsy on one side and her personal information on the other side. Then, she begins quizzing Ginger on her stats, like her real name and what charms she wears. On one hand, I was going to comment about how completely and utterly disturbing that is for Dodie to have, but if you think about it, that's actually quite an impressive skill--to be able to gather all that information about someone without even being in their social group. Dodie will make an excellent politician one day. And that's horrifying.

Hoodsey reveals the reason he doesn't want to go to Blake's sleepover is because he wets the bed. Carl says it's fine because Hoodsey is actually going to be a spy, and his job is to steal back the petrified eyeball while Carl chokes down Blake's gross milkshakes.

Why does Hoodsey have so many purple-hooded sweatshirts?

Meanwhile, Courtney has Winston print out various party-planning ideas for Miranda so she can find some charming games for the party.

Back at the Bishops', the girls move on to the Dos and Don'ts of Truth or Dare.

Carl has the ultimate plan to make sure Hoodsey will be able to get the eyeball back without Blake noticing. He digs through Hoodsey's closet and pulls out a jar containing several putrid, rotten eggs that they planned on opening on their first day of junior high school. Carl decides to test out the stench to see if it's potent enough. There's a slow build-up in the music, and that means that something's about to go down.

The girls immediately smell the stench in the next room, and the smell lingers throughout the house and down into the book club. All hell breaks loose as all the ladies run around like banshees and flee the house. Overreaction, much?

Lois stands in the doorway observing the kerfuffle, puts two and two together, and grounds Carl for two weeks. Why is being grounded the only form of punishment on kids' shows? Anyway, this means Ginger can't go to the sleepover because there will be no one to babysit Carl while Lois is at work. So, Ginger enlists Dodie and Macie to babysit Carl for the night.

Carl changes the plan up a little, and decides to have Hoodsey sleepover while taking back the eyeball simultaneously. Hoodsey still fears having an accident, so Carl tells him to not drink anything, and straps a conspicuous camera around Hoodie's stomach to watch his every move. He also gives him Maude's old hearing aid as communication. Damn, this kid could team up with Dodie with what these two come up with. Smuggled information, makeshift spycams and earphones... I smell a sitcom!

Carl takes Hoodsey's donut and eats it to make sure he is completely unable to relieve himself. That's kind of cruel and funny to take a donut away from a fat kid.

Sorry, Hoodsey, no donut for you.

Ginger arrives at Courtney's mansion, knees shaking because she can tell that Courtney is totally going to watch her as she sleeps and collect the hairs that fall onto her pillow. Courtney answers the door with rollers in her hair and is like, "Why are you here so early?" Then Miranda pops her Shrek face in the door and both laugh at Ginger's nervous desperation.

Well, Ginger, there goes your shot at popularity. 

Ginger goes up to Courtney's super glam and gigantic bedroom where a reverberated automatic voice welcomes Ginger. Courtney's in her bathroom brushing her hair straight, even though it was literally in rollers not 30 seconds ago. I guess they were just for aesthetic. Courtney's like, "How do you like my room?" and Ginger's like, "Oh, wow, it's toooootally goooooorgeous!" Ginger learns that all the guests will be sleeping on the floor in guest bedrooms, as if Courtney's social ineptness wasn't hammed up enough. Ginger tells her about the slumber parties that she's used to, and Courtney agrees to do it Ginger's way because, hey, she's the sleepover "expert." Miranda continues to be pissed off as usual.

The guests arrive, and Miranda angrily lets them in. Hoodsey trails behind them, but Blake answers the door after Miranda slams it in his face. Blake is like, "Hoodsey, where's my bro, Carl?" So, Hoodsey explains the situation. Blake lets him in anyway, but looks so disappointed. Aw.

Ginger meets all the girls and calls them by their nicknames. The girls barely recognize Ginger, and Ginger is feeling really uncomfortable. She suggests making "sloppy janes" which is supposed to be the lady version of sloppy joes, I guess. This is known because Dodie and Macie are seen in the corresponding scene making said sloppy janes in the Foutley kitchen. Dodie fantasizes about Courtney's room, meanwhile both are totally oblivious to Carl's whereabouts.

Carl is snacking in the doghouse while monitoring Hoodsey and Blake. Blake suggests that he and Hoodsey spy on Courtney's slumber party, which distresses Carl greatly because, again, he hasn't hit puberty yet. Otherwise, this would have been a definite side mission. Dodie and Macie crawl into the doghouse to bitch Carl out, but when Dodie notices the spycam on Carl's little TV, she explodes in orgasmic delight because, oh my God, it's Courtney Gripling's bedroom! It's a dream come true!

"This is, like, bigger than that time Courtney and I were both wearing the same colored shoes!"

Miranda decides it's time to play Truth or Dare. Naturally, it begins with Ginger. She picks "truth." Courtney asks her for her deepest darkest secret. Ginger nearly projectile vomits when she reveals her big, fat crush on Ian Richton, and all the guests gush among themselves. Oh, no. But then, Courtney utters one of the smartest things I've ever heard her say: "You could have just lied." Boom. There you go. Ginger, listen to me. You never, and I mean never reveal anything personal like that while Miranda is around; you just invited her to weaponize that secret. I bet even Courtney knows what Miranda could do with that juicy piece of info. Didn't you learn anything from Dodie's Dos and Don'ts of Truth or Dare?! Of course not. It's Dodie for crying out loud.

Carl directs Hoodsey back to the plan, but the earpiece is so loud that Miranda notices the noise and goes to the door to investigate. Hoodsey has run off and left the camera behind. Miranda assumes it belongs to Ginger, but she makes a joke about it that gets even Courtney laughing. Okay, one step back, one step forward. Nice save, Foutley.

"I'd never wear black with peach, Miranda." - Ginger

Next, the girls do some sort of activity where they make Ginger levitate, but Courtney drops her.

Hoodsey is about to keel over from being so thirsty, but Carl tries to keep him on track with the plan. When Blake leaves the room, Hoodsey searches the room for the eyeball and finds it on a high shelf. He grabs it, but just as he's about to leave, Blake returns. There goes that.

Ginger tells a scary story with a flashlight. It scares Dodie and Macie for some reason. How could they hear the story? The microphone is with Hoodsey. Oops. Logic error! Lois comes home and the girls skedaddle back into the house.

Hoodsey can't take his grumbling stomach anymore, so he pigs out, gnawing on cold chicken legs and cake and stuff.

Miranda's sinister laugh is heard, so Hoodsey hides in the pantry. Mipsy and Miranda come into the kitchen to prepare the classic hot water prank to make Ginger wet the bed. They inconspicuously place her hand in a glass of warm water, but Hoodsey decides to play hero, as he knows the struggles of bedwetting are for real. He removes her hand from the glass while everyone is asleep. Then he drinks the water. And promptly falls asleep.

The next morning, the girls all laugh and point at Hoodsey for pissing all over Courtney's plush white carpet in his sleep. How humiliating!

For real, this is so embarrassing I'm surprised Hoodsey didn't beg to move out of state.

Carl, Dodie, and Macie rush back to the doghouse upon hearing the loud chanting from the microphone. Hoodsey tries to wipe up his pee with Courtney's teddy bear, but she understandably flips the fuck out and kicks him out. You don't do that to a poor, defenseless bear! How could you?!

Ginger stands up for Hoodsey, but Courtney ain't having it. I mean, to her defense, some little boy she doesn't know slept in her room with all her friends, pissed all over her carpet, and tried to mop it up with her teddy bear. I know Hoodsey didn't mean to, but I understand. What I don't understand is why Ginger never questions what Hoodsey was doing there in the first place.

To save Hoodsey from further embarrassment, Ginger tries to turn the situation around on Courtney by "truthing" her, asking if she's ever wet the bed. Courtney is like, "Hell no!" So Ginger gets mad at Courtney for lying, and lets herself out, bringing Hoodsey with her. Pride!

So, what next? Do the rest of the girls just hang around with the smell of super-concentrated pee lingering beside them? Does Courtney call the maid to steam clean the carpet right then and there? (Probably.) And what happens to the bear? These are the questions that require answers.

That morning, the gang all talk about how awesome Ginger is for standing up for Hoodsey, and how Hoodsey saved Ginger from embarrassment, and what not. The episode ends the morning of a sleepover in Ginger's room with Dodie and Macie dreaming about Courtney's bedroom, I'm sure, while Ginger writes in her journal about sticking Courtney's bra in the freezer.

I've heard of the cold shoulder before, but never the cold boob!

Lessons Learned From This Episode: Stand up for your friends and justify their behavior if you have to; lie when you call out "truth" in a Truth or Dare game; suffer dehydration and hunger at a sleepover if you're prone to bedwetting